Why a Positive Mindset won’t help you create extraordinary love!

Why a Positive Mindset won’t help you create an extraordinary love!

relationship coaching with Michele Willmott

An exquisite, beautiful, emotionally connected relationship, which enjoys high levels of passion & eroticism is not created from a positive mindset.

A positive mindset only works when it works.

It is a plaster on a wound.

It will never be enough to counteract the heavy, dense energy & effects of one’s shadow.

There are 3 phases, which you will pass through, rites of passage or initiations one could say, on the way to creating your own unique love situation where you feel (& are) deeply loved for all of who you are:

  • Shadow – here the work is clearing a critical mass of the thinking & behaviour that keeps you stuck.  This is where you get to see the lies that shadow tells you in order to try & keep you safe, but which unfortunately keeps you far away from experiencing the love you really want.

From here you can enter into…

  • The Light Grid – here you are generally acting & thinking from your empowered selves. You may dip in & out of shadow but overall, you are able to create transformation. You are also able to see your shadows for what they are. You can create separation from them so that they don’t control your behaviour & responses.

Once you have spent time in the Light Grid, you realise that you are still basing your happiness on the pursuit & achievement of certain goals. This can be disappointing, which in of itself is ok, we can all feel disappointed. However, you know there is more & you are right.

The more is…….

  • The Dark Grid – now this is where it gets interesting. Dark is not bad, far from it. Dark is a euphoric state of being (no drugs involved) where you are beyond your mind. This is a joyous, heart opened place to be & it is HUGELY transformational because your normal, everyday relationship problems do not exist. You & your partner know exactly what to do & when to do it. Together you are creating your own masterpiece in love.

To stand a chance of getting into the dark you must be willing to go where you have never been before. You must be willing to let go of your mental constructs & go deep into your unknown.

When you first explore this place of not knowing it can be very uncomfortable. We all want to ‘know’ & to be able to see the future. It is that human need to be in control & have all our ‘ducks in a row’.

My question for you here is: ‘What is it like for you to not know?’ To not know what is coming next in your romantic life but instead to trust yourself that you will know what to do & when to do it.

What comes up for you?

The more you can hang out in this space the more accustomed you will become. It is a space in which you can feel much excitement in. There is much aliveness here when you let go & allow yourself to be guided. This is exactly what will happen if you can let go of those reigns of control. Your inner wisdom, intuition & guidance will start coming through more strongly. You won’t need to question yourself; you will just take action.

This action make look a little chaotic or messy on the face of it, however, it will always be transformational when it comes from this place within you.

Because you start to see transformations taking place (even if they are small ones), you are in effect receiving evidence that you can hang out here more; that you don’t have to have it all worked out & that you can trust yourself to live your life in the way you want to. This is proof that you certainly don’t have to subscribe to anyone else’s ideas about how you should or should not be doing things.

In summary, going dark as I like to call it, is not going to be a smooth ride, I would be lying if I said it was.

The worst thing that can happen?

Your shadows will kick up the fight of their lives, because to them it represents death. This will bring up much fear & resistance. It will feel like you are having to go against yourself. However, the fear is all a lie & is causing much sabotage that stops you from experiencing the true love you have always wanted.

Clearing your shadow is an act of radical love for yourself. Once you start to blast through & beyond your shadows you will receive more & more evidence that this IS the way for you to move forward. It is a wonderful opportunity for you to trust yourself more than you ever have done so before.

Lying in wait for you is the reward for being one of few courageous beings who choose to go against the conditioning that runs so deep.

The reward?

More love than you could ever imagine. A beautiful heart opened connection with your partner. Freedom to show up & be loved for all of who you are. Spontaneity, eroticism & fun.

It is for the brave. It is a journey only you can make.

If you would like to talk. I accept enquiries from those who know it is their time & are willing to go ALL IN.

About the Author

Michele Willmott, Relationship Coach and Mentor. I help successful men, women and couples renew and transform their relationship for the long-term.